What Men Really Want In A Woman?

So many women that I speak with feel confused when it comes to understanding what men really want in a relationship with a woman.

Many of the women looking for relationships these days, have trouble understanding why a man won’t commit even after he’s been in relationship with you for quite some time.

So, I started thinking… what better way to clear things up than share an email from a real woman on this very topic.

And also share my advice with you on how to deal with this situation without getting hurt or playing games.

Also you will learn what you can do right now to increase your odds of choosing the right man and being in a committed relationship.

The other night, I happened to be at a business function for women entrepreneurs.

I ended up sitting with a group of smart, interesting attractive women.

As we began to get to know each other it came into the conversation that I was a dating coach for women over 40.

Ironically many of these women happened to be single and in their 40′s to 50′s.

Well, as you can imagine the conversation immediately went to talking about all the challenges of meeting quality men after 40.
We covered a lot of ground about re-entering the dating world and all the challenges.

However, the biggest issue for most of these women was ‘how to get a man to commit’.

Several of the women shared stories about relationships they had in the past with some great guys.

But the relationships would finally end based on the fact the guy would not commit or him choosing another woman to date.

Cynthia, who was 41, was one of the single women at the table.

She shared that she believed you have to be up front from the get go.

Let him know early on that you are looking for a committed relationship was her recommendation.

I agreed with Cynthia that could be one way you could handle it.

Except the problem is men don’t respond well to that approach.

In fact, most men will look for the nearest exit upon hearing you want to be in a committed relationship.

I shared that the first step in dealing with this commitment issue, is to understand how men think and what they really want.

When you’re armed with that kind of understanding, then you can act and behave in ways that men will be responsive to.

Now, Cynthia wasn’t going for this idea. She said:

“There is no way I’m going to play games or change anything about me for any man.”

Oops…

I told Cynthia that I had far too much respect for smart, strong women to suggest that they should lower themselves to use manipulation tactics or other demeaning behaviors, all for the sake of ‘catching and keeping’ a guy.
But the reality is, men and women are very different than women.

To deny that fact would be like ignoring gravity and trying to fly.

It is what it is.

The majority of men out there in the world are afraid of commitment.

Granted in varying degrees, but no matter how you slice it you have to deal with it.

So as a woman, you need to use your ‘know how’ to help a man, help himself, to push through the fear to other side.

This is what allows him to move beyond the fear of commitment.

And it’s from that point forward he realizes how fortunate he is to have you in his life and is much more open to sharing a committed relationship with you.

If you were practice the principles in my video training program, Dating After Divorce you’ll realize the wisdom in keeping your emotions in check and having patience and self-control.

The result being the man you’re interested in will move toward you, instead of away from you.

It’s simply being a savvy woman who understands how men think and what they need to feel safe in order to be in a committed relationship.

Oh yes, before I forget!

Cynthia decided to try out my video training program and reported back that things had changed for her.

She said she’s meeting more quality men and that with her new understanding of how men thing and what they really want, the commitment issue pretty much a non-issue.

So, let’s dig a little deeper into what men really want.

Here is an email I received recently from a woman who follows my blogs about dating after 40.

Hi Suzy,

I’m recently divorced after being married for 17 years. I have been dating for about 4 months.

To my surprise, I met a man 6 weeks ago that I really liked. On our first date we went to dinner and he said he had a great time and would call me the following week.

Right after our date I sent him an email telling him I looked forward to seeing him again. He didn’t answer the email but I thought that was okay.

When he didn’t call the following week I called him and invited him to a concert that I happened to have 2 tickets for. He went with me we had a great time and again he said he’d call.

A week had gone by and I still had not heard from him.

So I decided to invite him for a home cooked meal, which he graciously accepted.

We had a wonderful evening and in fact, he stayed the night. We definitely have great chemistry. Again, he said he would call me, but he never has.

I have sent him emails and text messages and left messages on his cell phone but he has never responded to any of my attempts to reach him. It’s like he just disappeared.

I’m totally confused, what can I do to get him to call me.