Most kids whose parents are going through divorce need to know that things are going to be okay and that their parents still love them. And most kids ask the same questions: Why are you getting a divorce?, Are you divorcing because of me? and What will happen to me?
In many cases, parents simply do not have direct answers to give their children. How can you explain that you and your spouse “drifted apart?” Wouldn’t talking about an affair harm your children?
Also, tell your children that they did not cause your divorce. You may need to say this multiple times before it begins to sink in, especially if they are exposed to the custody battle. They need to know the divorce is not about them and that their parents will do all they can for their happiness.
Finally, it is important to give your children information about the future. Once you have agreed on a possession and access plan, let your children know the details and give them time to tell you how they feel about it.
Above all, remind your children as much as possible how much you love them. Keep their best interests central throughout your divorce and do not involve them in the disputes between you and your spouse. They deserve honest answers and immense love during this very challenging time.